Everything featured in the September 2021 Nintendo Direct

The September 2021 Nintendo Direct was a bit of a mixed bag, really. Here are the high- and low-lights from the presentation.

Look. We know what you’re thinking. That the announcement of the “surprising” cast for the animated Super Mario Bros. movie was the “biggest” piece of news from the September 2021 Nintendo Direct.

And for some people, it might be. The idea that they’re making an animated Mario movie and he’s not going to be voiced by Charles Martinet is, apparently, very upsetting. But this is a Hollywood adaptation and the studios need big names, regardless of whether they’re right for the role.

It’ll all come out in the wash, and it’ll either be terrible, or it won’t, or it’ll be somewhere in between. Honestly, just take a minute and breathe. Nobody died because Chris Pratt got cast in something. Chris Pratt gets cast in everything. There’d be nobody left if people did die from it.

On the actual video games front, a lot of the stuff in the September 2021 Nintendo Direct was… similarly uninspiring. They couldn’t even bring themselves to reveal the final Smash Bros. Ultimate character, just tell us when it was coming. Like we’ll care any more if they build up some tension. Yawn.

Also on the not caring scale, there’s Bayonetta 3, which looks very much like a Bayonetta game, for better or worse. People love it, and if you do then it looks like you’ll love this new one, too, but it still feels… a bit NSFW. Like you’d hide your Switch’s screen if you were playing it on the bus, lest people think you some sort of pervert.

Rounding off this festival of not giving a damn, there’s Chocobo GP (a Final Fantasy-themed rip-off of Mario Kart), a bundle of Castlevania games (that Konami clearly could not care less about), and some stuff about Mario Golf: Super Rush (which is fine) and Mario Party Superstars (which promises to be fun but just feels a bit uninspired).

On the more interesting front, there’s a surprise demo for Yoko Taro’s new card-based RPG, Voice of Cards: The Isle Dragon Roars, an even more surprising remaster of classic action game/city builder, Actraiser, and a release date for the Knights of the Old Republic remaster.

Things we are very much here for include the release date for Disco Elysium: The Final Cut, a massive expansion for Monster Hunter Rise, a Splatoon 3 trailer we weren’t expecting, and a look at Kirby and the Forgotten Land, which is: basically The Last of Kirby; is due in spring; looks amazing.

Best of all, though? Brewster is coming to Animal Crossing: New Horizons. Finally! A decent cup of coffee on that godforsaken island!