The September 2021 Nintendo Direct was a bit of a mixed bag, really. Here are the high- and low-lights from the presentation.
Look. We know what you’re thinking. That the announcement of the “surprising” cast for the animated Super Mario Bros. movie was the “biggest” piece of news from the September 2021 Nintendo Direct.
And for some people, it might be. The idea that they’re making an animated Mario movie and he’s not going to be voiced by Charles Martinet is, apparently, very upsetting. But this is a Hollywood adaptation and the studios need big names, regardless of whether they’re right for the role.
It’ll all come out in the wash, and it’ll either be terrible, or it won’t, or it’ll be somewhere in between. Honestly, just take a minute and breathe. Nobody died because Chris Pratt got cast in something. Chris Pratt gets cast in everything. There’d be nobody left if people did die from it.
On the actual video games front, a lot of the stuff in the September 2021 Nintendo Direct was… similarly uninspiring. They couldn’t even bring themselves to reveal the final Smash Bros. Ultimate character, just tell us when it was coming. Like we’ll care any more if they build up some tension. Yawn.
Also on the not caring scale, there’s Bayonetta 3, which looks very much like a Bayonetta game, for better or worse. People love it, and if you do then it looks like you’ll love this new one, too, but it still feels… a bit NSFW. Like you’d hide your Switch’s screen if you were playing it on the bus, lest people think you some sort of pervert.
Rounding off this festival of not giving a damn, there’s Chocobo GP (a Final Fantasy-themed rip-off of Mario Kart), a bundle of Castlevania games (that Konami clearly could not care less about), and some stuff about Mario Golf: Super Rush (which is fine) and Mario Party Superstars (which promises to be fun but just feels a bit uninspired).
On the more interesting front, there’s a surprise demo for Yoko Taro’s new card-based RPG, Voice of Cards: The Isle Dragon Roars, an even more surprising remaster of classic action game/city builder, Actraiser, and a release date for the Knights of the Old Republic remaster.
Things we are very much here for include the release date for Disco Elysium: The Final Cut, a massive expansion for Monster Hunter Rise, a Splatoon 3 trailer we weren’t expecting, and a look at Kirby and the Forgotten Land, which is: basically The Last of Kirby; is due in spring; looks amazing.
Best of all, though? Brewster is coming to Animal Crossing: New Horizons. Finally! A decent cup of coffee on that godforsaken island!
Everything featured in the September 2021 Nintendo Direct
- Monster Hunter Rise – Massive expansion called “Sunbreak” (due in summer 2022)
- Animal Crossing: New Horizons – The return of Brewster (more details in October)
- Mario Golf: Super Rush – Two new courses and characters (Koopa Trooper and Ninjii)
- Mario Party Superstars – Details on online play, game modes (and classic N64 boards)
- Disco Elysium: The Final Cut – Release date set (for October 12)
- Chocobo GP – A derivative Final Fantasy spin-off (based on Mario Kart…?)
- Voice of Cards: The Isle Dragon Roars – Yoko Taro’s new RPG (demo available now)
- Smash Bros. Ultimate – Final character reveal (yawn) on October 5
- N64 and Mega Drive/Genesis games – Coming to Nintendo Switch Online (with a price uplift)
- Actraiser Renaissance – A surprise Actraiser remaster (out now)
- Castlevania Advance Collection – A not-surprising Castlevania jumble sale (out now)
- Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic – Upcoming remaster (Switch release on November 11)
- Splatoon 3 – “Return of the Mammalians” trailer (looks great, but doesn’t tell us much?)
- Kirby and the Forgotten Land – Leaked just before the Direct (looks awesome, set to release in spring 2022)
- Bayonetta 3 – Exists, we guess? (No, really, we can’t muster any more enthusiasm than that)
- Super Mario Bros. movie – Has a “surprising” cast? (People on the internet are very upset!)
Want to watch it all again? Here’s the full September 2021 Nintendo Direct video presentation, if you must:
Now if you’ll excuse us, we’re going to go and start a hunger strike on Chris Pratt’s lawn.