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Wario has started writing Nintendo’s press releases

The WarioWare Gold hype-machine steps up a gear with the game’s latest, bizarre press release.

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WarioWare Gold

The WarioWare Gold hype-machine steps up a gear with the game’s latest, bizarre press release.

Video game press releases are often useful, but rarely entertaining. So imagine our delight this week to receive a Nintendo-issued PR update for the upcoming 3DS game, WarioWare Gold, written by none other than Wario himself.

Just like the time we reported on Dear Leader – a game about Kim Jong-un – we thought we would let the original press release do all the talking.

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There’s really not much more we can add to this, so here’s the full text. Take it away, Wario. 

IT’S ME WARIO! WAHAHAHA! I’VE TAKEN OVER NINTENDO ESHOP, SO YOU BETTER DOWNLOAD MY DEMO!

Press buttons, tilt the system, use the Touch Screen and blow into the microphone with 300 kooky microgames in my biggest WarioWare game yet!

Hey, you! Are you listening! It’s me, Wario! I’ve used my LEGENDARY creative skills to shake up the Nintendo eShop to feature some of my favourite games. It just so happens a bunch of them feature your favourite Nintendo character – WARIO! That’s right, I’m the best. BWAHAHAHAHA!

I’m also THE BEST at marketing the game that I made, so hurry to Nintendo eShop to download my free demo – FOR FREE! WAHAHAHAHAHA! It’s called WarioWare Gold, and the full game is totally coming out soon – on 27th July actually! Man, that’s really soon… I should work on my launch trailer…

But hey pal – want to rack up loads of coins when you’re playing the full game? Of course you do! WAHAHAHA! Well, you better have some compatible amiibo figures then! Unlock Wario’s amiibo Sketch and use any amiibo to watch me create an artistic MASTERPIECE of that character. You can then sell my genius work to anyone who’s willing to give coins, so if you need more coins, tap an amiibo and get rich like Wario! WAHAHAHA! But being such a genius is exhausting, so I can only create three drawings a day. So even if you scan more amiibo, it won’t work! WAHAHAHA!

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Mash, touch, twist and blow your way through 300 of my best EVER microgames when WarioWare Gold releases on 27th July! WAHAHAHA! The demo is out now in Nintendo eShop so you better give it a try!

For further updates:

The GREATEST website in the whole WORLD! https://www.nintendo.co.uk/wariowaregold

WarioWare Gold PR email

WarioWare Gold will be released on July 27, 2018 for the Nintendo 3DS, and a free demo is available to download now. You can also stay on top of the all the games coming to the Nintendo eShop via our weekly release updates.

(And we hate to break it to you ‘pal’, but surely Thumbsticks is the greatest website in the world?)


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Thumbsticks editor and connoisseur of Belgian buns. Currently playing: Paper Mario: The Origami King, Animal Crossing: New Horizons, and Pikmin 3 Deluxe.

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